A Quiet October

and a new companion

Last month I slipped away from my loose routine of writing here. Instead, I wrote heaps of poems and lots of lesson plans. My poems were full of microbes and constellations, which somehow feel related in a way I’m not quite ready to dictate. But those writings didn’t make their way to you.That’s why I’m pausing paid subscriptions for the time being. Until I can get back into a routine of writing, all my musings here will be without a paywall, and those of you on a subscription plan won’t be charged until I get back to my normal business.

October was a quiet month and I enjoyed it immensely. It’s taken me almost three decades to admit I like a quiet life. I’m not one for late nights or crowded parties, and while I don’t turn into a pumpkin at midnight, my clock-strike metamorphosis isn’t that far off.

This past New Year Eve’s I was still recovering from a cold, which meant I was in bed by 10:30 p.m. Looking back, this feels like a subtle omen for the year. Not the cold. Just the bedtime. This past year, I granted myself permission to construct new social habits. For my birthday, I hosted a brunch party. Marc and I crowded our apartment with a dozen guests. We ate pancakes and traded memories and played one of my favorite games. It was tender and glorious. They all left by 4:00 p.m. and I was in bed well before 10:00 p.m.

As we set into deep fall, I find myself relishing the quiet all the more. This close to the East coast, the sun sets before 5:30. The evening sinks its teeth into me, and I willingly play dead in its maw.

Yesterday’s grocery run included a restock on cocoa powder and marshmallows. Hot chocolate season has arrived. I made myself a cup at 2:00 p.m. today. While it’s already my natural bent, quiet and cozy has been embraced with new fervor this fall. In this endeavor, I found a new wingman: a four-year old cat who graced us with his presence for three weeks. Together we studied the science of blanket burrowing and couch naps, and he taught me that a cat-person also lives within me. He has since moved on in search of his forever home, but my first foster experience was a treasure.

Garbonzo, a dashing tuxedo cat with brilliant green eyes.

While Fitz is relieved to have the house to himself again, I miss Bonzo’s shadowy presence hovering at my feet in the kitchen. More on this soon. For now, I just wanted to poke in and say I’m here, but a little less here. I hope you find the quiet you desire, or the wild you desire if that’s more your speed.

Peace and love,

Shanley

Bonzo and I snuggled up.